


Don't lose me

by Ruquas



Series: Clint Barton Bingo [13]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alpha Bucky Barnes, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Clint Barton Bingo, Clint Barton Needs a Hug, Discussion of Abortion, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Omega Clint Barton, winterhawk - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-02-10 11:56:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18659944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruquas/pseuds/Ruquas
Summary: Dread settled in his stomach. Bucky wouldn‘t want him anymore. He would make him get rid of it. He didn‘t want kids, he had told Steve so, hadn‘t he? A tear escaped him.





	Don't lose me

Disbelieving, he stared at the little stick in his hand. At the little stick with the two pink, clear stripes. It couldn‘t be. It can‘t be. He was too old for this, probably. And they hadn‘t talked about it. Not really. But he knew how his alpha thought about it. 

_„Did you two thought about it? Having kids?“, Steve had asked one day. Clint was sure the other man didn‘t know that Clint could hear them. Otherwise, he wouldn‘t have asked._

_„No. Why should we, punk? Too loud, and let‘s stay real – can you see me changing diapers? Not the guy for it. Probably wouldn‘t work anyway and who knows what they put in my serum?“_

_Clint ignored the hollow feeling in his chest, ignored the pain. Ignored the look Natasha threw at him._

_Well, it‘s not his decision anyway, isn‘t it? His alpha had the last word in it._

He didn‘t even knew how it happened. He took his pills. The pills S.H.I.E.L.D. had given him for years. They said it was safe, as long as he took them on a daily basis. And now this.

„Clint? You in there?“, Bucky asked while knocking on the door. Dread settled in his stomach. Bucky wouldn‘t want him anymore. He would make him get rid of it. He didn‘t want kids, he had told Steve so, hadn‘t he? A tear escaped him. Maybe he would be allowed to give birth? It would hurt like hell when he had to give it up, sure, but maybe it would be better than the other option, wouldn‘t it? The kid could have a good home. Tony would probably make sure of it. Would Bucky accept it, accept this offer? He would be useless in those months for his alpha. And he knew the law, it didn‘t matter anyway. He was just thankful that Bucky probably wouldn‘t kick it out of him

„… nes asked me to give him access to the door for your own safety, Agent Barton. Due to the installed security precautions, Sir took I will open it now.“, he heard JARVIS, but he didn‘t react. He always had wanted a child. And now, it was almost… 

A loud crash brought him out of his thoughts. Hastily, he scrambled to his knees, let the stick fall to the ground when he saw Bucky, looking as if he was ready to kill whoever was in the room before his eyes settled on Clint, panic in his eyes.

„Clint? Baby? You‘re okay? You didn‘t answer.“, Bucky said and reached out to him. Clint flinched back.

„Please, don‘t make me get rid of it.“, he begged, not caring that he angered his alpha. Hoping his alpha would listen to him.

„Clint?“, the older man asked confused, but he couldn‘t listen. Not before he was finished.

„I will care for it, I promise. And I‘ll do everything you want, whatever you want, you won‘t notice a real change. Maybe Tony can build a projector, so you won‘t have to see it. And if not, I can look for another omega to take care of you, just please let me have it. You never have to see it, I promise, I‘ll do everything on my own, just let me keep it. I know you‘re allowed to give it away or… or get rid of it, but please don‘t. You can sever the bond, I‘d understand...“

Bucky laid a finger on his lips and interrupted his rambling. Half of it probably hadn‘t even been understandable. The tears were now flowing down his face, dropping down on the tiles.

„Clint, darling. What are you saying?“, Bucky whispered, kneeling down in front of him. _An alpha shouldn‘t kneel, a total disgrace. That’s for omegas like you_ , echoed his brother‘s voice in his head.

„Please. Please, Bucky. Alpha.“, Clint whimpered, looking down. Two hands cradled his face and he leaned into the soft touch, even though he knew better. But maybe it would be the last soft touch and he wanted to savor it.

„Darling, please. What are you sayi...“, Bucky began but when nothing followed, Clint looked up. Followed Bucky‘s sight and saw the pregnancy test still laying on the ground.

„I thought… the pills?“, the alpha croaked, not looking away from the test, his hands still cradling Clint‘s face.

„I took them. I swear, I didn‘t trick you. I don‘t know why they didn‘t work.“, Clint whispered, hoping desperately that Bucky believed him. Severing the bond would already hurt enough, but loosing probably the last little trust? It would kill him. The hands left his face. After a few minutes of silence, he dared to look up. Bucky was still kneeling in front of him but now hold the test in his hand, looking at it, his face not showing any emotions.

„Why would you think I would sever the bond?“, Bucky asked and then shook his head, finally looking at Clint with so much pain in his eyes that it took Clint‘s breath.

„Why would you think I would force you to get rid of it?“, he continued, sitting down on the floor.

„You said to Steve that you‘re not the type for it.“, Clint whispered, too afraid to change positions. His knees hurt but if it showed Bucky that he could be good, stay in position like a good omega should, it was worth it. _Except you showed him in the last months already that you‘re everything than that._

„I… I don‘t know what they put in me. If I could… if… I would hurt it. It‘s so… defenseless. Vulnerable.“, Bucky whispered and stroked the test before looking at Clint. „I always imagined I would come back and have kids. A whole bunch. Sure, I thought I‘d had them with Steve after the war before I knew he followed me. But… it was always there. I would never make you get an abortion, Clint.“

Clint watched in horror as a tear ran down his alpha‘s face. He made a distressed sound in his throat, just wanting to comfort him. He didn‘t knew if he was allowed to move. Did that mean that Bucky… maybe that he could keep it? And not only keep it but maybe also keep Bucky?

„Will you allow me to see it? I know that I obviously don‘t deserve it when I already did something to lose your trust like that, to loose it so… dearly, but I would really like to. You won‘t have to tell it about… me, I guess.“, Bucky said and made a distressed sound after a few seconds. Only then Clint realized that he shook his head.

„No, I mean… yes. Do you want to? I didn‘t dare to hope that you would want it, you know? I don‘t want it to grow up without you if I‘m allowed to have it.“, Clint whispered and crawled forwards to Bucky, giving a happy sigh when Bucky closed his arms around him.

„Of course, darling.“, Bucky answered, voice wavering. „I would be happy to have a child with you. I would be honored.“

Clint nodded, a smile on his face.

„I love you.“, he murmured.

„I want to kill everyone that ever made you think you couldn‘t talk with your alpha about something like that.“, Bucky said and Clint knew that it was as much as a confession as everything else.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [Clint Barton Bingo on Tumblr](https://clintbartonbingo.tumblr.com/), which can also be found here on AO3.
> 
> You can find [my Tumblr here](https://ruquas-dreambell.tumblr.com/). If you have a request, just let me know it there :)


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